COVID-19 has created divided opinions amongst society, but one thing that I think we can all agree on is the detrimental effect it has had on a lot of people’s mental health.
Between June and July 2020, Young Minds did a study looking into the mental health of adolescents through the COVID-19 pandemic. 80% of people who took part said that the pandemic had resulted in them suffering from a deterioration of their mental health.
As a parent it is difficult to know how to help our children through such uncertain times. I have put together some strategies which I hope will help you and your family.
1. Talk to your Child
Depending on their age, your child may not understand what is going on and be confused by all the changes happening. One thing I recommend is talking to your child about the pandemic and giving them some basic factual information.
When COVID-19 initially started spreading across the globe we tried to protect our 4 year old son from the mental effects of what was going on and didn’t tell him what was happening. He would then overhear things and I suspect was worrying about them without us realising. I think in trying to protect him we probably made him feel more scared.
I researched how to approach telling children about the pandemic and read something about the psychology of keeping children informed and it made sense. If you are not telling your children what is happening and they know something is wrong, they worry more about the unknown. If you calmly explain what is happening and how things are being done to stop the virus, it may help your child feel more in control.
2. Use Breathing Techniques
Taking deep breaths releases chemicals to calm your body down so it can help you feel more relaxed.
The kind of breaths that are really good for helping you relax are the ones where you breathe right in to your tummy. When you breathe in, you should be able to see your tummy get bigger, and then get smaller again as you exhale.
A good way of getting your child to practise this is by putting one of their soft toys on their tummy and then watching the toy rise and fall with their breaths. I find it is more effective if I lay next to my son and do this with him as it helps him focus better if I am settled too.
3. Be Consistent
Being consistent is a good thing to practise all the time, but especially during a pandemic when there is so much uncertainty in the World around us. By being consistent with children, they know what to expect and this can reduce anxiety.
Try to stick to a regular routine so that a child’s day is predictable. If a routine needs to change, explain calmly to your child what the change is so that they know what to expect.
4. Discuss How Your Child Feels
It’s important that your child knows that they can come to you to tell you how they are feeling. If you bombard them with questions about their feelings they may clam up, but if you make sure they know they can talk to you from your every day actions then hopefully they will come to you when they need to talk about their feelings.
You could try dropping into conversation that if they ever want to talk about things, you are there for them. This allows them to feel in control of when they choose to open up to you.
5. Limit Media Exposure
When I talk about the media, I mean both the news and social media in general. It is easier to keep younger children from being exposed to the media where there may be graphic news stories. For older children it can be more of a challenge.
When older children use social media, it becomes more difficult to protect them from seeing upsetting or worrying stories online. You could limit how many times they have access to social media and news sites, or perhaps give them a time limit when they are online.
If you think your child is obsessing over the news, it may be worth setting a time each day to go through what has happened and see if they want to discuss it. If they know that you are going to have that set time where you are going to have that conversation with them, they may stop looking at the news so much.
6. Do Positive Activities Together
Whilst the World can seem a negative place at the moment and there are a lot of upsetting things happening, it is even more important than ever to make time for positive activities.
This could be something as simple as playing a game, crafting something together or perhaps doing a home science experiment. You can find lots of ideas on Pinterest.
7. Keep in Touch with Friends
According to a UK study, 1 in 10 people felt lonely prior to COVID-19. In April 2020, this had risen to 1 in 4 people feeling lonely. It is more important than ever to reach out to friends, in a sensible socially distanced way.
Video calls have grown massively in popularity since the World has been experiencing lockdowns due to COVID-19. It is a great way of allowing your children to safely interact with their friends and prevent them from feeling isolated.
8. Mindfulness
Lots of adults are turning to mindfulness to help them to deal with the extra stresses that COVID-19 has brought to our lives. Mindfulness isn’t just for adults though. It can really help children too and I believe if you instil positive coping behaviours into children, they will grow up better equipped to deal with life.
Try getting your child to notice what is around them at that time. It can help to ground them and prevent them from worrying about the future if they are really present in that moment.
When I’m out with my son our favourite thing for us to notice is nature. At the moment there are lots of leaves falling so we have been focussing on all the different colours of the leaves. There is always something new to see even though we often go on the same route when we go out. As the seasons change there are so many new colours and sounds to observe.
9. Look After Yourself
Try and make some time for yourself to look after your own mental health. It is not selfish. It is more important than ever to practise self care so that we can be strong for our family.
When you become a parent you become ‘Mum’ or ‘Dad’ and it is easy to lose your own identity. You are a person too though and your needs are also important.
If you are finding anxiety is an issue for you, my blog on easing anxiety might help you. Click here to read it.
Conclusion
It is a massive challenge for children to learn to cope with the current pandemic, but you can help them. You are already a great parent for reading this far and wanting to learn how you can help them through this difficult time.
I would love to hear from you in the comments with any other things you have tried to help your child(ren) through the COVD-19 crisis, or how you have implemented any of the strategies I’ve mentioned here.
Please note that I am not medically trained so these recommendations are my own based on research I have done.
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